That is hilarious!

Here’s one that I tried once, but it resulted in the cashier and bagger looking at me like I’d grown horns.

I said, “Clearly, I have chosen the wrong line.” Then I covered my mouth and asked, “Did I just say that out loud?”

1. Look downward and shake your head, only slightly so as to give the illusion that you are sure no one would notice (but make sure they do notice). Give this 30-60 seconds.

2. If #1 does not work, look at the ceiling, applying the same technique as #1.

3. If #1 and #2 are unsucessful, stare down the person slowing the line and roll your eyes if necessary. This is the atomic bomb approach, so use sparingly.

While the line may not move quicker, these techniques are designed to grab the attention of the sales staff. I’ve been able to open up a new line in many cases. Note: I’ve noticed that this works particularly well at Target.

EMO stands for emotional - a new breed of kids who’s mantra is “I would rather feel pain than my emotions.” They have a uniform … aka “scene” - the funky straight black hair sprayed in a geometric style and the large quarter sized ear spacers. Ouch!

As for fake hand bags, they are easy to spot. They look cheap (like the vinyl in my dad’s 1976 Gremlin) and sport a huge ostentatious logo. Another dead giveaway is the threads that are invariably coming unraveled.

BTW, what is EMO? And how are you able to spot a fake Prada?